Lately, I've gotten a few emails asking that very question. They coincide with facebook posts to my wall asking, "what happened to TPE?"
First, I need to apologize to those who I have not responded to. I am reading my emails and appreciate every one's concerns. I'm so thankful for everyone who follows this blog and I don't want my absence to convey a different message.
Second, an explanation is warranted. Part of the reason for the lack of posting can be attributed to the fact that homeschooling takes up most of my free time. In the near future I'll be devoting a post on the subject of homeschooling and we can all discuss that further.
Another reason why I haven't been chatty on the blog is due to the stress of our current situation. Both hubby and I have been bit by financial and medical issues that sucked the energy out of me.
But in all honesty, the biggest reason for my absence is the sadness I have been feeling with regard to the world of prematurity. I am an optimist and can be found looking for the bright side or upswing in every situation. I'm always looking for the study or the report that shows promising information in regards to outcomes. They aren't there. This past month, within the preemie community (bloggers and people on the on line support groups) the sadness was overwhelming. We saw the death of older children due to complications from their early birth. Other parents were left wondering how this could happen, thinking that their child was safe once they were out of the NICU. Pregnancies ended early and resulted in parents making decisions to not resuscitate. New preemie parents are joining the groups in record numbers. Parents of toddlers are wondering what they may have done wrong because their child did not catch up by age 2 (like they were told in the NICU). Parents of older children are realizing that their child will not be making the recovery they had held out hope for. Children receiving diagnosis's of CP was more than some parents could handle. Marriages are falling apart due to the stress of having a child with special needs.
Is this past month any different than all of the months in the previous 10 years since Paige was born? No. And that is what has me down. Day after day, month after month, year after year the cycle continues. What has been learned from all of early births? Why are statistics not improving? There are times when it just gets me down.
I will be back soon. I just need time to recover. I started to feel that there was no use to continue this blog. I have changed nothing. (pretty sad that I thought I could actually make a difference when the problem is so huge) Then I realized that there is still so much I have to say. I started this blog because I was outraged at the fact that parents were being told that their preemie would catch up to his/her peers by age 2 or 3. Those of us in the trenches know this is not true and I feel, now more than ever, that something needs to be done about this. There are still parents blaming themselves for the outcome of their preemies. This should enrage you all as it does me.
Thanks again to all of you who have written to me to ask, "Stacy, where are you?" I'll be back soon and with the help of all of you, we will once again bring light to the subject of the long term issues related to prematurity.